Hello Fabulous mums,
Do you sometimes question your self worth as a mum? Let me make a confession today!!! I had this unworthy feeling many times…
My son was born in October 2012. He was a planned pregnancy and we were looking forward to his arrival in our family!!! Being a Psychologist I also had a lot of knowledge about parenting.
However, I have had many moments in the past and still experience times now when I question my self worth as a mum.
I worry about Am I loving enough? Am I paying him enough attention? Am I saving enough money for his future? Am I feeding him well? etc. etc. etc. I find that when I spend more time worrying and doubting, it does effect trust in myself and gets me feeling more anxious than ever before!
I know this would resonate with so many of you. As aspiring, bold, achievement oriented women, we tend to be very hard on ourselves. We fail to embrace the learning and growth that evolves from being a Mum , which is the most important key to experiencing joy of motherhood (than the stress of it all).
Remember there is enough demands on us anyway with baby’s sleep and feeding routines and our own sleep deprivation. Our negative thoughts and our doubts can certainly exacerbate our physical and mental exhaustion.
So what do I do when I feel not OK in myself ? I sit down in my room for 5 minutes. I take a deep breath, bring my self to HERE & NOW, BEING PRESENT in the moment. I accept that this feeling is only a feeling, it’s not a fact!!! I acknowledge my insecurity and don’t judge myself!!!
I also get my thoughts to think of a recent time when my baby smiled at me, gave me a cuddle back or held on to me. Focusing on this memory allows me to re-assure myself that I am doing OK as my baby is doing Ok. I sit in that moment feeling compassion towards my change and imagine giving a pat on my back for how much I am doing towards being a better parent each day.
All it take is 5 mins of slowing down and getting control of your unhelpful thoughts.
It is our responsibility to preserve our worthiness because it this confidence that will help us persevere through the high demands of raising our little ones. We all deserve to feel the contentment and satisfaction motherhood brings along in it’s journey!!!
Love & hope,